“When it comes to having sex while menstruating, there’s a lot going on. You’ve got a lot more to think about than just how horny you and the person/people you’re having sex with are. You might want to plan around the mess, experiment with comfort level, and you’ll have to face your body and it’s weird n wonderful functions in confronting ways.
Over the next three weeks, we’re going to be deep-diving into all things period sex: having it, not having, how to have it safely, how to ask for it, and how to have as much fun as possible while you do have it.
First up, we’re talking about everything you should know before you have period sex for the first time. Like, erm, did you know you should take different safety precautions while having sex when on your period than you would regularly? Or how to keep period sex hygienic? Or whether it’s possible to get pregnant after engaging in period sex? Comin’ up.”
— excerpt from A Beginner’s Guide to Period Sex, Part 1: Everything You Need to Know Before Having Sex While Menstruating
“Period sex being potentially pretty messy is one of the main things that puts a lot of people off. This could be because the societal stigma of periods has left you or your partner(s) feeling grossed out by the sight or thought of the blood itself, or maybe because you simply don’t feel like dealing with the extra admin that having period sex can involve, be it figuring out how to mitigate the mess, to how to remove your tampon without breaking up the mood, or how to leg it to the bathroom afterwards without leaving a horror movie-worthy trail of blood in your wake.
Maybe this one goes without saying but throwing a towel down is really step one when you’re initiating period sex. Even if you think your flow is light enough not to cause a mess, if you’d be gutted to stain your sheets it’s always worth throwing a towel down just to be on the safe side. Especially if the sex will involve any kind of penetration (penis, toys, or fingers), the sudden activity down there and increased vaginal lubrication can definitely be accompanied by a sudden… gush. Sorry.
Have shower sex. It immediately takes care of the clean up for you and it’s hot as hell, period or no period. Besides, if you’ve previously tried having sex in the shower or bath and found the water a bit of an obstacle to your natural lubrication, your period blood might actually have your back as a natural lubricant!”
— excerpt from A Beginner’s Guide to Period Sex, Part 2: Tips For Having Great Sex When You’re on Your Period
“Sex is a huge part of most of our lives. And so, for better or worse, are our periods. Unfortunately, there are a lot of societal taboos still clinging to both periods and sex that make them pretty heavy and occasionally awkward topics for us to talk about (especially us stuffy old English folks). Throw both of those things together and you have a bright red elephant in the room that, at least until we’ve unpacked some of our internalised shame and stigma, feels almost impossible to tackle.
Before you go any further into your period sex odyssey, I want you to answer two questions for me: have you spoken to your partner(s) about your menstrual cycle before? Do you already have vulnerable, open, honest communication about sex (non-period related)? If the answer to both those questions is yes, then you’ve already passed go – good for you. If not, you’ll have some extra homework to do. When you’re sharing your life / heart / body with another human being, communication is god. Especially when it comes to topics that can cause people to feel vulnerable.
Be patient and mindful of the internalised stigmas we’re all carrying, the ideas and stereotypes we’ve all been raised on and conditioned to believe, and the fact sex is one of the most personal, intimate, and vulnerable things you can talk about. Don’t expect it to be easy.
The good news? This stuff gets easier every single time you do it. Provided your partner is understanding and open to hearing everything you want to talk about, you’ll soon be wondering what you were ever so stressed out about in the first place. Above everything? Sex should be fun. Blood or no blood.”
— excerpt from A Beginner’s Guide to Period Sex, Part 3: How to Talk About (And Ask For) Period Sex
Isabella Millington 